Wife 1.0

Last year I upgraded Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0
and noticed that the new program began
unexpected child processing that took up a
lot of space and valuable resources. No
mention of this phenomenon was included
in the product brochure.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all
other programs and launches during system
initialization where it monitors all other system
activity.

Applications such as Pokernight 10.3 and
Beerbash 2.5 no longer run, crashing the
system whenever selected. I cannot seem
to purge Wife 1.0 from my system.

I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend
1.0 but un-install does not work on this
program. Can you help me?

- Mr I N Distress


Dear I N Distress,

This is a very common problem men complain
about but is mostly due to a primary miscon-
ception.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 1.0 to
Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely
a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT" program.
Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and de-
signed by its creator to run everything.

WARNING DO NOT TRY TO un-install, delete,
or purge the program from the system once
installed. Trying to un-install Wife 1.0 can
be disastrous.

You can not go back to Girlfriend 1.0 because
Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some
have tried to install Girlfriend 2.0 or Wife 2.0
but end up with more problems than the ori-
ginal system.

Look in your manual under Warnings-
Alimony/Child Support. Others have tried
to run Girlfriend 2.0 in the background,
while Wife 1.0 is running. Eventually Wife
1.0 detects the presence of Girlfriend 2.0
and a system conflict occurs, this can
lead to a non-recoverable system crash.

Some users have tried to download similar
products such as Fling and 1NiteStand.
Often their systems have become infected
with a virus.

I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just
deal with the situation. Having Wife 1.0
installed myself, I might also suggest you
read the entire section regarding General
Protection Faults (GPFs).

You must assume all responsibility for faults
and problems that might occur. The best
course of action will be to push the apologize
button then reset button as soon as lock-up
occurs.

The system will run smooth as long as you
take the blame for all GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a
great program but is very high maintenance.

Suggestions for improved operation of Wife 1.0

-Monthly use utilities such as TLC and FTD
-Frequently use Communicator 5.0

With best wishes,
Tech Support.

:yikes:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Still laughing my ass of as i´m posting...

:lol: lololololololololololololol :lol:

Dude, that is SOOOOOO old. Did you just get on the internet? :twak:

:wink:

lol, haha

Thats pretty good. :lol:

Oldie but goodie!

Thats halarious

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble. There are, however, conflicts between these two products, and the only solution was to try to run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound off. To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other applications, such as
Lads Night 3.1, Rugby 2.30, and Playboy 6.9.

Successive versions of Girlfriend proved no better. A Shareware program, PartyGirl 2.1, which I tried, had many bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks. I tried running Girlfriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when the systems detected each other, they caused severe
damage to my hardware.

I then upgraded to Fiance 1.0, only to discover that the system had to be upgraded to Wife 1.0. Wife 1.0 uses all my available resources, but does come bundled with FreeSex Plus and Cleanhouse 2003. Shortly after this upgrade, I found Wife 1.0 to be unstable and costly to run. Any
mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0`s memory and could not be deleted.They then resurfaced several months later when I had forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has auto Diary, Explorer and e.mail filter, and can, without warning,launch TurboStrop and WhingeExcel. No
Help files are available, and I have to guess what the problem is.

Additional problems are the expensive updates - ShoeShop Browser and Hairstyle Express need to be re-installed every other week.

Wife 1.0 also spawns child processes that drain my resources. These conflict with games I wanted, also when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Audi TT hard drive, it often crashes. Wife 1.0 also comes with an annoying pop-up called Mother-in-Law, which can`t be turned off. I have been tempted to install Mistress 2003, but there could be problems. I have been alerted to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2003. it tends to delete all your money files before uninstalling itself.

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!! Sounds like that wife 1.0 is vicious program!!!! Better not install it if you haven't already!! :)